What will life be like without my many addictions (food, especially sugar, facebook, internet surfing, craft supply hoarding, certain types of crafts, ebay shopping)? It will be terrifying. At first. What will it be like a few days in? Lonely. My addictions are like friends who hold my hands, shielding me right and left from negative emotions. Like WELL MEANING friends who, ultimately, shield me from really living. They form a barrier to my true calling (writing). They stop me from enjoying friends, barring the door to my home, convincing me that they offer all of the comfort and fulfillment of a roomful of human companions. They shout at me from all corners to ignore the lure of career fulfillment. After all, they'll NEVER reject me. "Don't run the risk!" They scream at all hours. "We come risk-free! You know us. You know we would never hurt you! Keep your mind on us. We are guaranteed to please. We won't fail you."
But they HAVE hurt me. They have damaged my physical and emotional health. They have stunted my development as a human being. They have robbed me of something as basic as sunshine on a beautiful day as I feverishly serve their demands. I want to be free.
I want a new addiction: following the leading of the Holy Spirit. Working hard to achieve the priorities He sets for me. Letting my hobbies fall to the fringes of my world. They won't go away. I'll enjoy them even more in the proper perspective. I am going to search the scriptures for the tools I need to be free. Tune in tomorrow!
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